18 March 2007

Warning: Living with a two year old might cause self doubt


Drew was the easiest baby. He rarely cried, was content to entertain himself, went with me everywhere I went, slept great, and on and on. Just a very happy go lucky, jiggy-with-it babe! But toddlerhood with him has been very difficult, even for this zen-minded mama. The word "no" comes so boldly out of his cherub-like face, it startles me... his full pout stays pursed long after the word has escaped and I want to grab him and kiss him! And in that very instant I can describe perfectly what is going on... his cuteness collides with his naughtiness and I am oh so torn over what to do with this "supposed-to-be-my-last-baby-that-I-have-babied-so-muchly".

Look closely... there he is in the middle of this pile of toys he creates almost daily during "naptime". I want those 2 hours reprieve so badly that I still enforce it, and yet I spend a good part of it walking in and placing him back in his bed. He worked on this messy little project for about an hour and a half before his little body just finally gave in to sleep and collapsed right in the middle of the floor. Sigh - this is life anew with my little guy. I could spend all day running after him and cleaning up the messes he creates! Remember this post?

I feel like a novice here, and yet I am not. I know the age two very well: I have four, count them, four children! And yet somehow, this particular child has one up on me! He makes me feel REALLY out of shape. Lol. I'm pretty sure he's the child they had in mind when they invented safety gates. We have one permanently planted out the mouth of our kitchen. And thank heavens there is one room in my home that I don't have to worry about. One room that stays relatively clean all the time. I often think of just moving in there and conducting all my business through the net.

It is amazing how far emotions can swing, especially in a 2 year old. One minute we can be cuddling on the sofa and the next he's crying out that he's hungry, but does not want to eat. Lol! He makes my hormonal shifts look mild. I lay awake many a night feeling like I'm failing. Like this perfectly normal stage of development is a reflection on me.

How is it that we forget what it's like? I said to my husband, "Were the others this difficult?" And he can think of specific instances that I have completely pushed out of my mind. This blessing of selective memory that mothers have? Genius. It is completely responsible for populating the earth.

:)

15 comments:

Becky said...

Ok, so I really feel like you were in my head a little when writing this. My son, the 2nd born and last child we think, just turned 1 in Feb! Anyway, he was very easy UP TILL NOW! I have cried and worried and prayed and cried and wanted to run away...all in the last three days. What has happened to my baby? I so DO NOT remember my daughter being anything remotely close to this. But, maybe it is that mommy memory block. I loved that part of the post - so true!!! Thanks for sharing this and making me feel a little better about my mommy skills right now! Have a beautiful week - you deserve it!

Morning Glory said...

Selective memory? Is that how all this happened?

Don't feel too frustrated -- my daughter's room looked like that even into high school. I finally just had to shut the door and walk away.

Jen said...

Yes selective memory here too. My DH says I forget my oldest being as..."trying" as my 2 year old is now.

An Ordinary Mom said...

My little whirling dervish two year old son definitely gives me a run for my money. One minute I love him to death as we are playing chase and the next minute I am ready to lock myself in my room because he won't stop shrieking at something!?!? He does make my mood swings look very mild - that was very aptly put.

Hang in there, though, we will all survive this stage ... I hope!

scribbit said...

My last one was like that, the PERFECT baby. Slept 12 hours straight by six weeks, never cried, the perfect kid. And being that she's my last I've been rather sappy when it comes to her growth and development, enjoying every minute. I was thinking today during church "when she gets too big I'm not going to have anyone to hold on my lap during church anymore." and I got a little sad thinking about it.

Char said...

Maybe it's a 3rd kid thing....my #3 is about to drive me to drink already and he's only 13 months. Take the tantrum that split his lip open on a bench at church and covered both of us in blood yesterday, for example...

txmommy said...

two years old is not the most easy going delightful age, although they are darn cute...maybe so we won't eat them:)

Tigersue said...

Kendra is in the habit of saying "I won't!" How is that for a variation of no. We don't even know where she learned that one from.

Pattie said...

We forget what it is like because if we remembered how bad some days are with a two year old, we all would have just one child
;-)

utmommy said...

I have a son just like that. He's now almost 6 and he is STILL on the go non-stop. It definitly causes self doubt. I guess all we can do is try our hardest and do the best we can. Good Luck!!

Montserrat said...

Two year olds are professional con men. They know exactly how to manipulate us into looking past their faults so we can love their cute, funny, adorable, kissable, huggable, little selves.

Amber said...

What a cute picture. :-) Even though my daughter is 2, I've been filled with self-doubt since her birth. She's a tough, spirited little one and compared to her, #2 is positively easy!

Jenn in Holland said...

Yes, from "no" they move into "i just do it by myself, okay?" and every day with a kid (especially the 'last' kid) is an adventure in balance and negotiation. I laugh and I cry in the space of a single hour, and like you the mood swings of my youngest (3 years old, but developmentally delayed) make me look like a well balanced individual. Hang in with the zen-like mindset Lei. We all know this is going to be gone too soon and we will be missing the messes!

Nettie said...

My husband recently commented that if number 5 wasn't already here, my 2 yr old number 4 would have him seriously considering not having a number 5! Nothing is safe. Even the top of the fridge is no longer secure. Thank goodness they are still so cute, or we'd all want to sell them!

Tracey said...

Selective memory. Exactly. That's why journals and blogs are so wonderful. You write down these marvelous tidbits so that when you have grandchildren and want to say that YOUR children were angels, you can truly remember...

That picture is frameable. Love it!